We know post-irony when we sees it.

I think things that are hideous and bad are cool. For instance, on Jimmy Fallon the other night, there was a "tastefully-painted upright piano." This piano was mostly pink, with patches of flame decal, a painting of a sunset, and a heart with wings — it was downright awful. Yet this piano was the coolest piano I'd ever seen. I was fully aware it was ugly and ridiculous and that is exactly why I liked it. I have no need for a piano; I don't play and don't think I'll ever pick it back up after burning out of private lessons in the 6th grade, so I can't see myself ever wanting to buy one. But that piano was so over-the-top that I desired it, exclusively for its purposefully poor esthetic qualities.

This phemenon has been called post-irony by someplace I can't remember, but the term always stuck in my mind. A quick UrbanDictionary search revealed the definition I always thought it was, plus the word "penis" twice. "Post-irony" is the sarcastic liking of something that you are aware is uncool. Irony, really, kind of fits that same definition, but post-irony is usually defined by sincerity, whereas with standard irony everyone is aware of your sarcasm.

This makes it all but impossible to determine when someone is being ridiculous and when they are pretending to be ridiculous. To us uncool people, post-irony is the greatest thing ever. Nerdy glasses and T-shirts with stupid slogans on them like, "I can only please one person a day. Today is not your day," are what I wore in high school as a result I was considered somewhat of a loser. Now, however, I can wear the exact same outfit and be cool and disinterested in a post-ironic way because now I am totally aware of how stupid that crap is.

But there is a line. There is still stuff that isn't cool, even in a post-ironic way. For instance, there was a brief period of time in France last year where bulky, plaid jackets were the hip clothes. And we are all aware of America's post-ironic love affair with trucker hats. But Alaskan ice road truckers, despite wearing those hats and jackets, were never cool. There's a juxtaposition between a skinny, handsome kid and the trucker hat that isn't there for a hemorrhoidal truck driver.

This juxtaposition is the core of post-irony. In the modern pop music genre, I've had some limited success being cool by mocking interest in Hanna Montana. This involves mostly throwing the horns, head-banging, and use of the phrase "shreads the guitar" along with other heavy-metal clichés. By contrast, The Jonas Brothers have yielded little post-ironic success through mock liking. My only conclusion is that it is simply inconceivable for anyone to like Hanna Montana who is not a 12-year-old girl, whereas the Jonas Brothers were nominated for a Grammy.

Post-irony is complicated but ultimately boils down to this: anything is cool. Actually, the fact that I don't play the piano makes me desire that tastefully-painted upright piano even more.

Mark Johnson is an unprofessional writer who drinks too much and smokes too little. Witty, unconventional, cavalier, badass: all terms rarely used by others to describe him. Mark takes nothing half as serious as perhaps it should be taken; to date, this has not gotten him physically harmed, but he worries. His personal blog is available at whynotjustblog.blogspot.com